CROTON FALLS — When was the last time, on screen or on stage, a simple, tentative kiss brought tears to your eyes? It happens in The Schoolhouse Theater’s staging of “Kimberly Akimbo” by David Lindsay-Abaire.

Lindsay-Abaire is the clever, Pulitzer Prize-winning playwright who has made a name for himself through a rare talent for tackling thorny topics with both pathos and provocative humor.

In this work, his plot conceit is a 16-year-old girl whose genetic disease causes her to age 4-1/2 times faster than normal, so her physiognomy is that of a 70-year-old. 

Kimberly Levaco is surrounded on the compact and totally utilitarian Schoolhouse stage by a certifiably wacko mother, Patty, who’s both pregnant and a hypochondriac; a teddy bear of a father, Buddy, who can’t get out of his own way; a crass and criminal but doting Aunt Debra; and geeky classmate and fellow outcast Jeff, who has a thing for anagrams, Dungeons & Dragons and, after a fashion, for Kimberly.

As the title character, despite her senior citizen status, the elegant Ruth Reid physically captures the callowness and cunning maturity of teenage girls in such a way that captivates the audience from the first scene, and never relinquishes control. Her malady notwithstanding, she is both the matriarch and the soul of the household.

Each performer in this stellar ensemble holds his or her own equally well. As service station laborer Buddy, who also is a barfly, Brian Hotaling renders a disarmingly authentic portrayal. He is as good as his acting is effortless.

As the Martha Rayesque mother Patty (a show biz reference for us old-timers), Molly Hale provides comic relief just by her pantomime-influenced presence. It comes as no surprise that the program reveals she was with Chicago’s famed improv troupe Second City.

Mollie O’Mara’s Aunt Debra is a commanding character that’s tough as nails outside and soft as feathers inside. 

Israel Guiterrez, as Kimberly’s friend Jeff, is making his debut as a Schoolhouse performer and he is quite the find. His character is pivotal in illuminating Kimberly’s true emotions about her condition — which Reid accomplishes with heartbreaking understatement — and the young actor’s portrayal is never less than thoroughly engaging and matter-of-factly empathetic.

In the hands of Lindsay-Abaire, “Kimberly Akimbo” is akin to a balancing act that manages to hover both precariously and stealthily just this side of politically correct. He has a light touch with conversational dialogue that flows naturally and swiftly, yet is given weight by eccentric characters whose foibles we recognize—in others, perhaps in ourselves—all too readily.

So skip the boob tube one night to see something whose caliber you won’t see on TV. Besides, there’s nothing like live, intimate theater, and you won’t regret discovering The Schoolhouse Theater’s many charms that has earned it acclaim well beyond its environs.
After the Sunday, March 7 performance, Director Raymond Munro, Scenic Designer Ken Larson, Artistic Director Pamela Kareman and General Manager Quinn Cassavale joined the cast onstage for an informal chat with the audience.

Munro, whose deft handling of the show is a major cause for its success, remarked on the hyper-aging condition depicted in the show, noting that he’s nearing 60 and “gradually, imperceptibly slowing down, but it’s happened over 20 years.”

Despite his remarks, let’s hope he continues to brighten the stage with numbers as good as this one for years to come.

"Kimberly Akimbo" can be seen March 11-14, 18-22 and 25-28. Tickets are $30 on Thursdays and Fridays, $32 on Saturdays and Sundays. Thursday, Friday and Saturday performances are at 8 p.m. Sunday performances are at 4 p.m. The Schoolhouse is located at 3 Owens Road, Croton Falls, N.Y., just off exit 8 on I-684.

For information and tickets, call (914) 277-8477. Visit the Schoolhouse on the Web at www.schoolhousetheater.org.